By: Melissa S. Wollering
The Milwaukee Brewers’ starting rotation, questionable from Day 1, incurs injuries and declines in quality start production. That triggers work overload for the bullpen as Bill Castro cracks a figurative whip on exhausted arms. The outfield starts running down long balls; the infield must save their pitcher’s derrière as he walks batters, throws wild pitches and loads bases. Last but not least, Ken Macha sends a desperate S.O.S. to Doug Melvin by putting Carlos Villanueva on the mound. This domino effect immediately before the trade deadline probably has you asking: is a major trade worth it when no single pitching acquisition could fix a force as destructive as Prince Fielder swinging blindfolded in a glass factory?
Prior to Tuesday, the Milwaukee Brewers lost 15 of their last 22 games of duck-duck-goose. If you call it duck-duck-grey-duck, you must enjoy Twins baseball.
Looking at the schedule, the months of July and August were supposed to provide the Crew with an ego boost greater than what Elisha Cuthbert and Kate Hudson could do for your depressed roommate by macking on him. Between playing the Pittsburgh Pirates, Arizona Diamondbacks and Washington Nationals, as many as 12 games could have made Jake H. from Madison richer as he places bets in Vegas while on his honeymoon. By the way, Jake, the SportsBank.net officially wishes you a blessed, sports-filled marriage!
Instead, because a Vegas blackjack table is more reliable than betting on a Brewers-Nationals game with Carlos Give-it-a-ueva on the mound (tip o’ the hat to Justin Z. from Green Bay), Jake will probably lose $100 bucks then hit up the slots. Nice wedding present, Macha.
Macha’s mission to resurrect postseason play in October is narrowing. In order to salvage the season and gain momentum, the Milwaukee Brewers need to reverse the Blueberry Hill Fats Domino Effect. Yes, that’s right. You’re noticing Prince has some resemblance to Fats, aren’t you?
Think Outside the Box…Taco Bell does one thing right. It markets itself against convention. The Brewers have a good start: moving Mike Burns down and R.J. Swindle up. Now start Tim Dillard. Heal Dave Bush using Sportscreme, give one of the AAA prospects a chance for the heck of it, pray for a Chris Capuano recovery miracle and find that never-before-considered option.
Is there anyone we can pull back from retirement for a third-tier prospect? Paul Byrd? Oakland A’s Justin Duchsherer could be ready to return in just two weeks and he’s a free agent come September. Right Field Bleachers offers advice on this matter and a convincing argument as to why a two-month rental like Jerrod Washburn is mental.
Trades Should Not Be Riddled With Regret…Carefully examining the future of the Brewers organization is a must. If Ken’s Machtober is destined for 2010 instead of 2009, selling your farm for a van down by the river is something Matt Foley would become enraged by.
Alcides Escobar, Mat Gamel, Angel Salome, Lorenzo Cain, Jonathan Lucroy, Cody Scarpetta, Brett Lawrie and Taylor Green are probably the largest assets within the farm system. JJ Hardy could be dealt, but we may regret that move next year.
Panic Induces Extemes, Resist It…If Milwaukee decides it is not buying, that doesn’t mean the team has to start selling. The same team spent a majority of the first-half of the season atop the division. It has a history of slumping worse my aging neighbor with scoliosis. The team has successful players on its rosters; a slightly different combination of players could at the very least stop the bleeding.
Just Win a Series…June. The Mets. The last time we won a series was nearly a month ago. Take 2 of 3, no need to sweep; just gain some momentum. Winning a series seems to emotionally reset the brain of every player on the team. Since the fictional team psychologist isn’t doing it for them, they need a new and positive outlook.
In this week’s “Friendly Fire With the Cubs,” carefully consider what you bring for an autograph signing. Nicole does a nice job over at Cute Sports and one of her readers submitted this:
…When I met [former Brewer] Doug Davis over the winter and we were getting a few auto’s, my Cubs buddy asked him to sign his Cubs hat. Davis looked at him kind of funny and my buddy said, ‘hey, write whatever you want’. Doug said…’anything?’ My buddy said ‘ANYTHING’. So Doug signs the underbill of his fitted Cubs hat, ”Cubs suck. I own them.” God bless, Doug Davis.
In this week’s “Chart Magnificence,” we examine the odds Jake H. faces in Vegas should he desire to throw his marriage start-up money away on the Milwaukee Brewers. You could argue these are the more than just “game” odds…
