(Editor’s Note: this is being re-published from June 12, 2014. Also, check out the 2017 edition of this article from 2015, in which we made a conspiracy theory for every single team in the 2017 Draft lottery, drops Sunday, 6am central)
It’s summer so all your favorite shows are in re-runs; including the NBA Finals. The Miami Heat are here for the fourth year in a row, the San Antonio Spurs are here for the fifth year in the last eleven. Also, who the Spurs and Heat beat to get here, the Pacers and the Thunder, could have been easily predicted by anyone with at least an entry level knowledge of the NBA.
Being painfully predictable doesn’t mean it’s fixed- it just means it’s boring. However, the fact that the NBA conspiracy theorists have so much fodder, the fact that the NBA is such an easy target for the black helicopter and men-in-dark-suits crowd, is the problem.
Is the NBA totally “pure competition,” always on the up and up? Hell no!
Is every NBA Finals and NBA Draft Lottery a scripted outcome like the WWE? Hell no!
The truth is somewhere in between.
This isn’t a black-or-white reality. “We’re in a grey area? How grey? Charcoal.” (CC “Fletch”)
I don’t like the NBA conspiracy theorists, nor do I like the “purists,” as I call them. I use the term purist to denote those who think the game is completely pure of manipulation. I hate both groups, because some of them, but not all, take a “you’re either with us, or with the terrorists” type of mentality. It’s all-or-nothing to them.
Sorry there Sparky, but the world doesn’t work that way. Like Obi-Wan Kenobi said “only a Sith deals in absolutes.” But I’m sure even a Sith is fun to hang out with some of the time as well. The “evil” people are always way more fun to party with.
Now I haven’t watched a second of this NBA Finals, nor will I, at any point of this series. Watching Lebron James suffer appeals to a lot of people, but not to me. I’ve been vocal about this on social media. I’ve also been vocal about how no one else seems to agree with me.
Through three games, the 2014 NBA Finals are averaging 14,921,000 viewers per game, up five percent versus last year’s Finals through three games (14,278,000 viewers). You have the most boring superstar in history, Tim Duncan, with the most boring nickname in the history of sports “The Big Fundamental” and Popp, the most boring interview this side of Darryl Sutter.
And like that over-played commercial with The Muppets says “no, we ain’t got no room for boring. For boring, we ain’t got no room.”
In short, I would rather watch “this is a test of the emergency broadcast system, this is only a test” than this NBA Finals. I’ll have to live without watching the supposed beauty that is the Spurs passing in a half court set, and the struggles of Miami’s defensive rotation to adapt to it. Again though, I’m just one guy, and the ratings are doing just fine, excellent actually, without me.
Before we look at some NBA games and events that look like they were fixed, there are three things that everyone, the NBA conspiracy theorists, the purists, the undecided, and the apathetic need to realize.
1. The NBA is a team sport branded as an individual spot
Maybe this why the NBA “sucks” so much in my opinion right now. At least when compared to college basketball.
College hoops is my favorite sport, so basketball is probably my favorite game, yet I my distaste for the NBA grows stronger by the day. (Here are five very important people who are also telling you college basketball is a zillion times better than the NBA…not the level of talent, obviously, not the skill or athleticism of the players, but the entertainment value of the product). Obviously, the NBA is the most elite level of play, but in the pros everything is about the name on the back of the jersey. In college, it’s about the name on the front of the jersey. Cliche, but still painfully true.
2. Individual star power supersedes market size
Whenever anyone debates the NBA conspiracy theorists, it’s always about “oh that’s only the 23rd size television market, it’s not fixed,” or “of course, it’s fixed, New York City is the #1 TV market.” Yes, market size matters, but individual brands matter MUCH MUCH more. There’s way more money in getting Lebron James in the Finals, regardless of how small Miami is, than getting a big market team. The disparity in potential revenue is not even close.
3. Tanking and utter corruption are completely real.
The Spurs tanked many years ago to get Tim Duncan. The Nets tanked in April to get the playoff opponent they wanted. The 76ers tanked like 80% of their season. The Indiana pacers tanked friggin playoff games! Seriously, remember versus in Atlanta in the first round when they lost the ability to even score a basket for an entire half?
In short, if they can tank, they can fix. When tanking is this obvious and this pervasive, God only knows what goes on behind closed doors. I was there, in September, when Dale Earnhardt Jr. openly talked about how they manipulate races in NASCAR. I’m sure they’ve mastered this in the NBA too. The Black Sox in 1919 throwing the World Series, the cartoonishly evil and corruption of the NCAA, IOC and FIFA….should I go on?
Here is some of the food that NBA conspiracy theorists feast on. Were these events fixed? Only David Stern, Adam Silver really know for sure.
1. Last year’s NBA Finals
The Spurs had the Heat on the ropes for good. So much so that Miami “fans” left early. And then Chris Bosh said publicly that the Heat are better off without those “fans.” I’m sure those fans then made quite a few Chris Bosh looks like a dinosaur/velociraptor/ostrich/struthiomimus jokes.
Game six and seven last year just seemed about as real and legitimate as Hulk Hogan versus the Ultimate Warrior at Wrestlemania X.
2. This year’s Eastern Conference Finals
Game 5 was essentially Hulk Hogan versus Andre the Giant at Wrestlemania III. So the refs make sure Lebron gets an absurd amount of fouls right off the bat, and is rendered obsolete for an entire game. That gives the Pacers life and forces another game and additional revenue.
3. 2002 Western Conference Finals Game 6
Check out this exclusive with Tim Donaghy; whether you believe him or not, he certainly says some interesting things. The footage of the NBA shafting the Sacramento Kings and being a nanny state to the Los Angeles Lakers has been analyzed more than the Zapruder film. Because the horrible officiating in this game has made it the second gunman on the grassy knoll to NBA conspiracy theorists.
4. 1984 NBA Draft Lottery
Here’s the video below. I’m not convinced. Show me the bent corner, bent edge, whatever it is that gives it away that this was manipulated. I just don’t see it. It doesn’t make sense, Also, why do the Cleveland Cavaliers keep winning the lottery over and over? It makes zero sense to fix it for Cleveland, why give them the #1 pick? But it’s statistically impossible to do win it 3/4 years; especially when the odds weren’t in your favor to begin with. So although no theory holds water in that situation, it also is a scenario that just couldn’t happen.
In summation, I’m not signing up for either camp, the NBA conspiracy theorists, nor the purists, but it’s pathetic that it’s even come to this. This is a 1,400 words I should have never been forced to write.
One camp I will join, hell I’ll even be a camp counselor, is the “NBA has degenerated into predictable, unwatchable garbage (at times)” camp.
Paul M. Banks runs The Sports Bank.net and TheBank.News, partnered with FOX Sports Engage Network. and News Now. Banks, a former writer for the Washington Times, NBC Chicago.com and Chicago Tribune.com, currently contributes to WGN CLTV and KOZN.
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